My house is in chaos. For the past six months I have been able to maintain some sense of order and cleanliness. This is no small feat seeing that H3 is not one to notice (or care) if things are not neat and tidy. In fact, I think he prefers the messy look.

Each weekend I have deep cleaned the house and after work I try to pick up the mess that is made while I am away. Does it make me mad that H3 can't find 20 minutes to pick up before I get home from a long day at work? Of course it does! I just wish I could make him realize how important this is to me.

Sorry, I digressed into husband bashing.

One of my biggest flaws is that I can't just clean. I always end up reorganizing something. This weekend I decided to reorganize all the kitchen cabinets and create a mini bar on the baker's rack.

Now the entire house is in chaos. The dinning table is covered with items that I have removed from the cabinets; there is a pile of items that need to go in the attic; and a there’s pile of junk that needs to go to Salvation Army.

I spent so much time on the cabinet clean-out that I did not have time to clean the house. Now there are piles of dirty laundry blocking the hall and each room is just a mess. To make matters worse, my parents are coming to town next week and I don't know how I will get it all cleaned.

My parents are the most meticulously clean people on earth. Their house seriously looks like a museum. H3 claims that trying to live up to those standards make me insane. There may be some truth to that, but I feel less stressed if everything is in its place and the house is clean.

I love coming home to a house that looks neat and smells good. I love going to sleep in a room that has fresh crisp sheets and nothing on the floor or piled on tables.

When we lived in a much larger house I was better able to ignore the clutter. Then again, maybe that is why my life always seemed out of control and I was always so unhappy. I actually refused to go downstairs (the dungeon) because of the mess that H3 and Rnady made down there.

It became a running joke that the dungeon was off limits for me. In fact, H3 would do whatever it took to keep me from entering his dungeon domain because I would freak out every time I walked through there.

But I hated the fact that I we would not invite people over because I did not want anyone to know how we lived. I also feel guilty that Megmonster would bring friends over and they would see the mess that we called home. I worry that our lifestyle embarrassed her. My only defense is that it was not always that way -- only the last six or seven years.

Now that we live in a (very) small house, I have a difficult time ignoring the mess. So even if I have to spend my weekend cleaning, it's better than feeling stressed. I am trying not to panic about the 'rents visiting, even though I am worried about how I am going to work all week and get the place looking semi-clean. I moght take Friday off to get the job done. I'm sure my current migraine is a result of the self-induced stress.